Reflecting
by Lushi
Summary: "Why do you have Karen's spirit?" "Because I'm the one that offed her!" Loke and Hibiki's thoughts upon seeing the woman who killed Karen.


Hibiki recognized the man the moment he appeared in a flash of light, the same suave expression and dark suit. How many times had he seen that very spirit at Karen's side? Oftentimes lounging at the Blue Pegasus guild, chatting and sipping wine. He'd never really minded the man... not until _It_ happened.

Karen's death.

He knew Leo was responsible. He knew all about it from Karen. How he'd stayed a long three months in the human world, rendering Karen defenseless and unable to take jobs. No money for food or rent.. It was his fault that Karen had died. And he knew Leo knew. He remembered seeing the spirit leaving the guild, hands in pockets, head down, already suffering feelings of guilt. It was only a small consolation to Hibiki; no amount of regret could bring his love back. And still he harbored feelings of resentment for years. If only the spirit would have resolved it sooner. If only he had been there to aid Karen. If only he had not been so stubborn... maybe Karen would still be by Hibiki's side today. He often imagined scenarios where he came across Leo and gave him what he deserved.

And now, here he was. Only mere feet away from Hibiki. The man who caused his beloved to die. And yet... he had no words.

Leo looked just as agonized as himself.

* * *

The words hit Loke like a brick. No, a ton of bricks. Painful, emotionally-jarring bricks.

**"Why do you have Karen's spirit?"**

**"Because I'm the one that offed her!"**

For just a moment, it was if his heart stopped. This woman, this Celestial mage before him... killed his master, Karen? That fateful day Karen had set out on a mission she had no hopes of completing, that day she tried to achieve what she knew she was incapable of... the day she died. All because of him. Because he'd held out in the human world too long. Because of him, she couldn't open another gate. The gate that could have saved her life that terrible day. Because of him.

He felt his fingers curl into fists, digging so deep into his skin that it drew blood. This woman... this woman was responsible for all the years of suffering and guilt he'd experienced. Three long years of endless nights wishing he could go back and do things differently; wiling away the miserable hours with women and alcohol. Unable to sleep, the same statement playing over and over in his mind: _I killed Karen._

And it was all this woman's fault. Although he still considered himself indirectly responsible for Karen's death, the blood was on this wizard's hands.

For that, he could never forgive her.

* * *

**"Because I'm the one that offed her!"**

Hibiki felt a shock run through his entire body at her statement. _Karen..._ His body swayed a little and Hibiki nearly collapsed, just barely righting himself in time. _Karen... this woman did it..._

His teeth ground together, trembling a little as tears spilled over and rolled down his cheeks.

_To my... beloved..._

Hibiki's physical wounds seemed nonexistent at that moment, incomparable to the emotional pain he felt. It had been three years, and he still had yet to get over her death.

Three years. It had been awhile, but he could remember that day clearly.

_"Please, Karen.. Please don't go...!" Hibiki gripped her wrist, desperation and concern etched across his features. _

_Karen growled and yanked her arm out of his grasp, her long fur coat swishing as she turned her back to him. "Stop treating me like a child. I'll be just fine."_

_"Karen..." Hibiki's hand dropped back to his side, a shadow falling across his face. "You can't have two spirits out at once.. with Leo in the human world, you'll-"_

_"Shut up!" Karen whirled around, the familiar expression of rage crossing her face, her velvet red lips curled upwards in a snarl. "I'm not weak! You'll see! Even with that pesky lion getting in my way, I can do a simple mission like this." For just a moment, a vulnerable look reflected in her eyes. "I have no other choice..." Teeth clenched and the fire returning to her eyes, she turned on her heel and stormed out of the guild. Leaving her lover, hand weakly outstretched, in her wake. _

_Nobody could have known that would be the last time he'd ever see her._

* * *

Now both of the men's rage-filled gazes were upon the woman named Angel only a small distance away.

_It was you._

_You Celestial wizard.._

_You... it was your fault.._

**_You killed Karen._**


End file.
